It's a bit off, now that I've come home and taken a look at the actual companion cube, but you'll have to excuse me since I didn't spend hours staring at the cube before (well not lots of hours anyway.. >.>) and so doing it from memory I forgot the pink lines going off the sides of the circle (between the white boxes) and the white boxes are supposed to be rounded around the center, but close enough.  xD

So anyway, day 2 of my photo journal.  Today's cake feature is the Companion Cake (v.1.2), strawberry-banana flavoured vanilla cake with a chocolate button on top (the part that's decorated to look like the white circle with the heart on it is chocolate. XD )  the first of my collection of theme cakes.  Of course "collection" is a strong word since there aren't any more, and I don't have any ideas for any more (yet).  But just you wait, they'll come to me, and they will be glorious.  :3

And now thanks to Walter I have a companion cube shirt and plushie. <3  I'm totally wearing it tonight.  =P

Been awhile.  A LONG while.  For those of you that care (about me?) or find this entertaining to read, then yay for you.  For those of you who don't care.. Screw off and get off my page?  O_o  Lol.  So yea anywa...

Get used to this.  They're probably not going to be long, but I decided that I'm going to start using this (or try to) once a day, kinda like a picture journal more than a normal journal thingy... Only one picture a day though.  But they (should) be good.  ^_^

Oh yeah.. The picture for today.. It's Kitty Under Glass.  My kitty (Meroko) being a genuis.  She's trying to drink the last drop of my milk out of my glass.  She's lucky it wasn't a taller glass. Because then I would have made even more fun of her.  :3

But naw, I figured that since I'm restarting this again, I'd start off with one of my favourite things in the world. And right now, since she's being a good kitty (which may or may not be rare, depending on my mood and what she's doing) she gets my vote.  A little about my Mero:  She's about 6 months now, (in the picture she's like 3 mo.) and she's the most adorable bad kitty in the world.  She likes to snuggle, cuddle, and be held (most cats dont! ). When I get home from work, she usually meows at me and/or jumps up into my arms and makes me carry her around for awhile until she's satisfied with the amount of attention being spent on her.  Which is fine by me.  Because she's so cute. <3

That's about it for now.  I'll be back ... Tomorrow.  With a special cake.  XD

O_o  Thursday already... (sigh)  The days go by so fast.  My serving time is almost up, Friday marks the final day of serving for group 1.  Then we head our butts back into the kitchen.  >.>  Which, for a cook, you'd think I'd be excited, but I'm really not.  XD  Cooking, man.. The hours are so much longer than as a server.  The cooks who were out serving this section were like "omg this is so relaxing.. So much free time.. Why am I a cook again?  Oh yeah, right.. I hate people."  XD  At some point or another, most of us have said "I wanna go back to my kitchen D:"  but for the most part, we're just enjoying our "vacation"  xD

I feel like I'm getting dumber.  O_o  (Is that even possible?)  Apparently it is.  I feel like such an airhead a good part of the time.  I'll just randomly space out and stare into nothingness, lose train of thought, forget what I'm supposed to be doing.. Wander around aimlessly, make stupid mistakes on simple procedures.. >.>  Maybe I need more sleep?  Who knows.  XD  Maybe more nutrition...  >.>  But I don't like eating, so I'll just go with the "more sleep" thing.  The thought of food makes me kinda nauseous for some reason...  =_=  *Actually went to bed just after midnight last night*  Be proud of me!  I actually got my ass to bed at a (semi) decent time for once.  O_o  I hope it's not becoming a trend.. Or maybe I do..  But yeah, since I went to bed at 12, I actually woke up at 5:30 (because I'm used to getting about 5.5 hours of sleep...)  But since it was so early, I forced myself to go back to sleep.  XP

I should be doing my homework right now.. >_>  *cant be bothered*  =_=  I really don't feel like it, it's so boring and I have no idea what to do really.  It's supposed to be writing questions for an interview, then more questions you'd ask the reference when you talk to them about the potential employee.  Sounds boring as hell, really.  I did the first part, but the rest of it.. zzz.

I guess I'll get to that, and leave this open-ended in hopes of remembering to finish it later tonight... XD

*****************************

Sorta remembered, but not till friday morning.

I'm tired.  i want more nap sleepy time and stuff.  *dies*  I slept lots last night/ this morning.. I went to bed round 1:30 or somthing, then uh.. woke up at 6:30.. had a shower at 7:30, and then went back to sleep at like 8:30.  XD  woke up at 10.

Back into the kitchen after this week..  Kill me.  X_x

O_o

o_O

Lets see...  I have to figure out how to get this stupid visa.  I'll try calling the dumb place myself tomorrow morning.  Fortunately, the good news was.. I talked to the co-op work coordinator dood, and he said that the visa could take up to 6 weeks... Which isn't quite as long as i was afraid it COULD take...  >.<  But yeah.  6 weeks isn't so bad assuming I can get it done asap.  Same with the insurance thing.  I gotta get that shit sorted out too.  >.>  Stupid stuff and .. stuff.

I'm kinda tired an feel nauseous.  =_=

More later.

***********************

Later..  What day was this?  I keep posting space savers, then forgetting to finish them.  XD   *reposts to check date*

Oh.  Tuesday?  I think... >.>  What did I do tuesday...

I forget.  I guess this day is a bit of a writeoff.  I'll post now for some other day.  XD

In a bad mood.  Not going to get into details.  But whatever.  >_>  Just felt like making my space saver for later I guess, since i have fuck all better to do. >.<  Other than maybe homework that I'll probably leave till the last minute, as usual.  Meh.

*************************

Good thing i saved the space because I totally forgot about this.  >.>..  Oh well.  XD

Better mood now, but problem not solved.  It will be soon.  Not sure on how it will be yet, but depending on what happens, I may or may not be going to USA over the summer.  XP

************************

Dinner service was.... BORING!  I had only one table, remember that it's one table between two servers... Gah, I hate it when it's so boring and dead.  Thankfully she said that it's supposed to be busy tonight, but.. We'll have to just see about that. We've had alot of cancellations or reductions of group numbers.  So bleh.  At least my mom is coming tonight, so that's good, I hope.  o.O  Last night I was just feeling like shit too, i wanted to smash my head on things (which I did too, the wall, the cupboard, the fridge door...)  me and being bored do not get along well.

Appetizer:: Warmed tomato stuffed with ricotta and crab, served with micro greens and balsamic dressing
Crab..  They really have to cut back on the amount of seafood they're using in the kitchen, it seems that every single day at least 2 of the specials have seafood in them, meaning I don't try them.  >.>

Soup:: Roasted Red pepper & Mussels
Mussels...  *sigh*

Entree:: Poached Salmon and Pan seared Halibut with caper cream sauce
MORE SEAFOOD!  >_>  They really need to start like.. Iuno, talking to each other a bit more and figuring out what the other specials are on the same day (because each special is done by a different person) because their specials are... Well , they leave not much room for option.  Since when are we a seafood restaurant?

Sides::
Roasted potato cup stuffed with pureed potato & tomato
Canelone stuffed with caramellized onion, red pepper and ricotta cheese
Risotto arancini with asiago cheese
Potato, good.  Very good.  I love potatoes.  Canelone was a bit underdone or something, it looked kinda gross, although it looked really nice on the plates. The risotto was pretty good, and it was funny having people try to figure out the proper term for "risotto balls"  xD

Dessert:: Baked pear stuffed with mascarpone mousse, served with blueberry creamcheese mousse.
Pretty good.  Although I'm not a fan of creamcheese, the mascarpone (which is essentially creamcheese, but its alot milder and creamier) was good.  XD

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Note to self:  When in the kitchen doing specials... do NOT use seafood.  Try not to stuff everything (because there's been a ton of "item 1" stuffed with "item 2" things on the menu as well.. usually in the sides).  Never use meat on a vegetable item (who would do such a thing?  Apparently the current people in the kitchen think that wrapping a vegetable in bacon is a good idea.. Since when is bacon a vegetable?  XD)  Try not to use nuts or pork in the vegetables either.. The veg goes on every plate, regardless of what is ordered (unless the person specifies that they can't eat a certain thing.. but we don't usually tell them what the veg of the day is, so unless they have an allergy, we dont find out until after)...   Blarghaghahhghhghgh  O_o

Reminiscing always makes me feel so depressed.  >.>  I have to go through all my junk and get rid of the things I don't need or don't ever use, because if I plan on moving (whether for temporary or for permanent) I really need to cut down on the amount of useless junk I have.  Although, alot of it isn't so "useless" because it has some sort of sentimental value.  But then, I realize, alot of things that are useless tend to do that. >.>  Maybe it's their evil way of avoiding being thrown out.  ....  D:  Poor things~!  I dont wanna throw them out even more now.  =(

I found this old tape that me and Jenn used to record back and forth on, and it makes me want to do it again.. *doesnt have a tape recorder*  The letters we used to write back and forth, the story we were slowly writing that had no point and was really dumb, but it's all good memories of some better times, y'know?  Maybe not "better" in general, but better times between the two of us, since, due to things and stuff and both of us kinda losing contact, we don't talk even 1/4 as much as we used to.  x.x  Granted, we used to go to school together, saw each other every day, hung out every day, sometimes even weekends.. hehe.  Ah, the times we had.  XD  *feels old*

Old letters from past and present friends, Jarron Slater, If anyone remembers him (probably most have never even heard of him.. lol)  One of my first online friends.  I lost touch with him when he went away on his mission (church thing).  I used to like him so much, I felt really bad that we lost touch.. But then I got into FS really deep, so I kinda forgot about missing him, though I never forgot him.  FS of course brought on a ton of people, quite a few of whom I'm still (somewhat) regularly in contact with.  Clud, of course, and Colin as well.  Two people who I'm almost positive I'll never lose touch with, even if we dont' talk as much as we used to.  Walter and Aaron.  I seem to have lost Aaron somewhere, but Walter and I still talk every so often.  He calls me.... If I had more money, I'd definitely call him too.  (Maybe text?)  Lisa, I'm sorry I suck at replying to letters (SOOO SLOW) but I'm really happy she still writes to me.  Phoebe, whom I've dragged along with me onto RO, I'm sure we'll keep in touch.  XD  Of course, from FS there was also Jon.  I know he's still around, but I really haven't spoken to him in.. um.  Really, it's been ages.  I found a bunch of pictures of us, and some other things, when i was going through my stuff.  More memories.  Curses.  =P

Then from FS I moved onto some other stuff that I never really kept with for too long.  Gunbound brought Jose, another person whom I still sometimes talk to, but not quite as often.  Gunbound also brought my sisters and their friend David together, and they dragged him along to RO with us.  He's a cute kid.  XD

And then there was (and still is) RO.  Of course, since I don't see or talk to many people often anymore (antisocial?  busy?  bit of both I assume.) I'd assume that most people don't even know anyone that I talk to from RO, unless they've played it themselves recently.  XD  There's of course Phoebe, and Greg plays RO with us, but I see him irl too.  X3  Jan got me into RO, but he's pretty much quit now.  Lumi and Darky are always around.  And of course Darty.. All nicknames.  I'm not so good with real names I guess.  Lumi is Jason.. Darky is Jeremy (though.. I've never used his real name, or heard anyone use it.. so i kinda forgot what it was for awhile) and Darty is Edward.  Chrissy (my sis) plays on Ro with us, and Davi too of course.

And also for anyone who didn't know already, I guess it's not a bad time to say so, although it may be a bit late coming.  XD  There's a good chance I'll be movin down to Pinehurst this May (assuming I can get the work visa all sorted out).  I'll be living with Darty for about 4-5 months or so.  Then, depending on the visa, how much it costs to live there, how things work out, etc etc etc.  I might stay there for another year or so longer.  He's in school right now, so he can't really move anywhere.  I really don't know what we're gonna do, but I'm not that interested in becoming a permanent citizen of the USA, so I'm strongly leaning towards dragging his ass back up into Canada.  =P

And yep.  That's about it.  o.O

***************************

My dad and Lisa came to dinner tonight, that was pretty fun.  My tables were easy as hell. One was my dad and sister, the other was two girls from the HRM class who are not currently serving.  XP 

Appetizer:: Curried Mussels
Noted in the name of the food is the fact that I did not try it.  XD

Entree:: Mirin glazed pickerel fillet on spagetini in ginger soy broth.
Was not bad, for fish.  Needed something, though.  A bit of spice, or herbs in the broth maybe, because it was a little plain.  Also came with red peppers, zucchini, carrots and brussels sprouts in the pasta.

Starches:: Wild rice Pilaf, Lemon Linguini, Poached Baby Potatoes.
Didn't try em.  Heard the Potato was good though.  They were poached in three different broths: Tomato, Beef, and Saffron.  Lol, my sister asked me "what's saffron"?  My answer was "its some yellow stuff".  Yep.  I'm a culinary genius.

Dessert:: Chocolate Mousse Trio
One was chocolate mousse cake.  It was what we made in patisserie I think.  Pretty good, but a bit dry.  Two was Chocolate pate.  It's chocolate pate.  It was good. Three was Chocolate Semifredo (again) So yea, it was fine.  =P

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Saffron : http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Saffron

So.  This is our upcoming "spring break".  Hardly what I call a Spring Break though.  Damned college, thinks that they can trick us with a nice long weekend?  Feh.  They took away our spring break last year for the first time in um.. Ever?  (Figures, they'd do it when I started here.. Bastards.)  Anyway, they figure that in consolation of losing our spring break (for some unknown reason) they'd give us a four-day weekend in .. What, February?  >_>  Some nice timing they have.  Its so nice and frigid out in February, I think we should all write them a letter of thanks..  XD  *yea right*

So today is "friday"  and Tuesday will be "monday"  >.> 

*after night*

Tonight rocked.  XD  I was a server for two captains, meaning I actually had three tables... Meaning i was actually somewhat DOING something.  Rule.  XD  I was so bored out of my mind the night before, I'm glad i got something good to do this nite.  AND~  I got to do FOUR flambes.  That rocked.  XD  Especially the first one.  It was the venison, and two of the ladies at the table ordered it, so it was a double.. Big flame.  And, I had 4 tables watching (three other than the one it was for) and got applause from two of them.  XD  So much fun.  ;P  Me likes fire.

The one table I had was four lil elderly ladies.  XD  They were really sweet and very nice.  I liked em cuz they were really talkative, and enjoyed themselves alot.  I'd imagine that getting a table like that is one of the best parts about being a server.  I like little old ladies (well.. THe pleasant ones, anyway.  XD)  The other two tables were kinda quiet and kept to themselves, especially the one of four ladies (two younger, two middle-aged.)  They were boring to serve, and never really seemed that impressed with anything.  XP  The third table was a family of three (mom,dad, son) and at first they seemed bored and not easily impressed.. That was, until the flames started.  That got em talkin.  =P

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Dinner specials:
Appetizer: Tuna Trio; Seared Tuna with purple Kohlarabi, Tuna Sashimi with Salmon Caviar and Wasabi Mayo, Poached Tuna Lollipop with Golden Beets.
Long name, very small portions.. >.<  Didn't try any of them, since it was near-raw fish..

Soup: Shrimp & Mango Bisque
Shrimp.  X.x

Entree: Prosciutto wrapped lamb loin stuffed with herbs, served with cabarnet chanterelle mushroom sauce.
Good lamb, I love herbs.  Basil, Thyme, oregano, rosemary... Yuuuummmmm!  Super tasty. <3  I'm not really a big fan of lamb, depending on how it's done.  But this was nice.

Dessert: Chocolate Semifredo with Banana Sorbet and a Brandy snap
We made these in patisserie when we were doing the frozen dessert unit thing.  it's basically a thick chocolate mousse thats frozen.. or something very similar to that.  XD Was quite tasty.  The banana sorbet was a bit tart, though.  And the snap was basically a sugary stuff with nuts and thingies stuck in it.  XD Good though.

Tuesday was a write-off.  We didn't really do much.. Researched the menu, learned about umm... How to flambe (which was mostly for the Hospitality students, rather than the Culinary students..)  Oh, i guess I should explain this..

Currently we're in the "evening dining" class.  We, the culinary students, and the group of Hospitality students are taking turns doing things.  There's three groups we're broken up into.  Group one, being me, is in the dining room first, for three weeks.  We serve, there's a total of 17 of us.  The culinary students only serve, while the hospitality students each have to host/hostess and bartend once each.  So, there's 15 of us serving (gag.. so many people..)  one host/hostess, and one bartender. The group of servers is broken up into 7 captains, and 8 servers.  The captains take the orders, ring through the payments, etc, etc.  The servers.. Well, serve, top up waters and drinks, and do the flambe, if the people order any.

After the first three weeks, the groups switch.  The HRM students get a 6 week break from evening classes (lucky bastards) and the culinary students basically switch off.  Group 1 goes back into the kitchen, and group 2 comes out to serve.  (I would like to just stay serving.. I'm bored of the kitchen.. Lol.  ;P)  Anyway...  So that's what we're doing in class now.  >.> 

For the first menu, I pity the foolish vegetarians.  Especially any that are allergic to nuts, or dont like mushrooms.  Because our only vegetarian item on the menu (that isn't a salad) is a mushroom pie with walnut cream... So yeah, sucks to be vegetarian.  Mwahaha.  (hates vegetarians... But I really think that most cooks do.  Along with the hatred for people who like their meat well done.  Wtf is the point in eating it if it's well done?  The meaty meat is what gives it all the great flavour! O.o)  *cough*  Anyway.. =P

The menu is a bit more pricy than I initially thought it would be... But it's still not too horribly bad.  Alot of the food is stuff that I'd never want to eat though.  We're a fine dining restaurant, so we serve our food in courses.  In order.  Which is a bit different from what most people are used to, I'm sure.  But it's interesting enough.  And we have tableside service (flambee items are actually done right in front of the customer by the servers... Hehehe.  FIRE YAYAYYY  >:3 )

**Later after class**

Got home around 9:30.  Not too bad, but today was a really easy night.  I was a server, and we had an average of only 1-2 tables per 2 servers (sad, yes) I was bored out of my mind for a good portion of the night.  Luckily, Greg and Jan came, so I was entertained by them for a portion of the night.  And I got to do a flambe (woot) so that was ok too.  Serving is fun.  But I don't think I would like to do it for a living. I feel more at ease in the kitchen... Although, I really really love the fact that when I go in the kitchen now, I'm not expected to DO anything.  Visiting is fine, I don't look forward to when I'm actually supposed to have to go back.  XD  Oh well.

**********************************

Analysis on Menu 1:

::Appetizers::
Smoked Duck Breast Risotto:
Tasty.  Actually, quite good.  The portion we had for tasting today was really lacking in the salt department, though.  If it had that extra bit of salt, it would have been excellent.

Champagne Scallops on Leek and Mushroom Vermicelli:
Didn't try it.  Why?  I hate scallops, and leeks, and champagne... And mushrooms, depending on how they're done/how much there is in the dish.  My verdict?  Yuck. =P

Escargot Purses with Fennel Butter:
Again, didn't try it.  Snails? No thanks.. Fennel tastes similar to black licorice, which I also don't like.. It was served with a tomato sauce, which was probably it's only redeeming quality...

::Soup::
Cream of Fennel and Crab:
I dared try it.  And as much as I think it would be a great soup, I can not stand crab, so, again... Yuck.  X.x

Classic French Onion:
Don't like onions... Also don't like the French, so...  XD

::Salad::
Frisee and Endive salad with warm Brussels Sprouts and Toasted Pecans with Dijon Dressing:
Longass name. >.>  It was pretty good.  Although, imo, the serving size was way too small.  It was like, honestly, maybe 5 bites.

Avocado, Grapefruit, Red Onion and Feta with Creamy Orange Dressing:
Not bad.. Although, again, I found it to be a pretty smallass portion (although i guess it is only like 4 bucks.. But still...)  The avocados were not ripe enough for the salad, they practically needed a knife to be cut.. >.<

::Entree::
Pistachio and Herb Crusted Chicken with Mustard Cream Sauce:
Finally, the first thing on the menu that I can actually say I had no complaints what so ever about.  Good food. Yummy.  I love chicken, and pistachios.. And Yum.  Good stuff.

Pan Roasted Venison Tenderloin with Flambeed Plums:
This is fun to make.  It's our dinner flambee item, meaning.. FIRE!  XD  The sauce is nice, the plums were a bit tart from being a touch underripe.. The meat itself needed seasoning.  But with a bit more salt, it would be awesome.

Rack of Lamb Persillade with Red Wine Lamb Reduction:
I'm insulted.  They did a hack-job of my lunch special recipe.  *emo*  =(  It's not bad, but the Lamb Persillade I did for my lunch special was so much better.  First off, they're not grilling it, they're pan frying it... So it doesn't get that nice grilled flavour.  Second, they're not coating it in the mustard and persillade the right way... It's not nearly as tender and tasty as mine was..  *sigh*  But oh well.  I'm not gonna go in there and complain... Yet.  >.>

Pork Tenderloin with Cider Jus and Rutabaga Puree:
It is quite tasty.. Although the way the meat was prepared (maybe it was just overdone?)  It was very tough.  I had a VERY hard time cutting it.  Granted, I was using a plastic fork (metal knife) but even then, it shouldnt have to be ripped apart the way it was.  Also, needed salt. =P

Mushroom Pie with Walnut Cream:
Same as on our lunch menu.  I don't like mushrooms.  But I've heard it's good...

Arctic Char Fillet Meuniere:
Arctic Char.  It's fish.  But surprisingly... Good somehow.  It doesn't have a fishy taste at all, all I could really taste was the sauce they had on it.. Which was very tasty.

::Dessert::
Chocolate-caramel Tartlet with Roasted Bananas and Cashews and Ginger Citrus Caramel Sauce:
The name itself is a mouthful.. >.<  The dessert?  If you don't try to eat the tartlet, you'll be fine. (although without the tart, it's a bit boring to just eat chocolate sauce and caramel with some nuts in it..)  The dessert tasted awesome.  But the tart shell?  I think it was made out of cement or something, maybe.

Chocolate Chambord Torte with Fresh Fruit Flambe:
Best item on the whole menu.  This dessert rules.  AND it gets set on fire.  Totally worth it in more ways than one.  XD  It's basically a piece of fancy chocolate cake with some flambeed fruits that are in caramel butter and stuff.  Yummmmmm~

Yogurt and Brown Sugar Panna Cotta with Grappa Gelee:
This was.. Alright.  I'm not a huge fan of yogurt, so it wasn't my favourite thing in the world.  But still, pretty good.

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All in all, I don't really like the current menu.  Thankfully, there's daily specials to try out every day.  So they may (or may not) be good.  XD  The main menu, though, has alot of weird things on it.  The apps are alot of seafood.  The menu is chalk full of nuts, so anyone with a nut allergy is screwed.  =P

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::Daily Specials::

Appetizer: Grilled Polenta with Sauteed Shiitake Mushrooms and Gorgonzola cheese:
Um.. It was alright.  Though, I didn't know what it was when I was tasting it, because at this point our guests had started arriving, and any foodstuffs that we hadn't tried yet were just kinda left on the back table without any introduction.  So i ate it without knowing what I was eating, and it wasn't until i tasted it that I figured out it wasn't a dessert.  XD

Soup: Beer and Cheddar
Gross.  It needed salt, and I hate beer.

Entree: Grilled Mahi mahi with Pineapple and Red Pepper Salsa, topped with Coconut Shrimp:
Seafood.  Bleh.  Mahi mahi is interesting.  It tasted fishy, which I didn't like.  But the texture was almost chicken-like.  Good pair with the Pineapple, at least.  XP

Side Options:
Potato: Squash & Potato Latkes
Rice: Indian Rice
Pasta: Herb-stuffed Tortellini
The latkes are like potato pancakes.  They were undercooked, so tasted like pasty mushy half-fried potatoes.  Not so good.
The rice was seasoned with pine nuts, cumin, coriander, and had coconut milk and raisins in it.  Not too bad.
The pasta was awesome. Stuffed with Garlic, basil, thyme and goatcheese.  Yum.

Dessert: White chocolate sheba mousse with Banana Sorbet and Apple Chips:
Apparently It didn't set in time for service, so we didnt get to try it, or serve it.  XP  Sounds good though.  And it's chocolate and banana, so I don't see how it could be bad in any way.  XD

Wine Pairing:
::Sumac Ridge Gewurtztraminer::
Quite fruity and aromatic.  Has the scent and flavours of grapefruit, lychee, apple, rose petals... I didn't like it that much though.  It was too fruity. (I find that fruitier wines taste too fermented for my liking)
Fruity wines are often good pairs for fish or fruit.  The type of wine (gewurtztraminer) is normally good with any type of spicy foods (such as thai or asian cuisine, mexican). Is also good with fruits.

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Yay.  I can't wait for um... more stuff?  XD 

So yeah.  I'm gonna start this crap up again.  I stopped mainly because I.. Well, there were a few reasons.

One, I went off on a rampage on someone in here not too long ago, and it wasn't very nice or umm.. Very mature of me to do.  Lol.  Also, online journals I found to be way too emo and drama-filled.  >.>  But then while I was browsing for a recipe online and I found this girl's journal website thingy where she was posting her entire schooling experiences online.  Seemed cool enough.  I had actually been planning to do that in the first place, but never got around to it.  But meh, never too late to start.  XD

So lets see.. Monday, school started at 8am today.  SUCK!!!11  I totally don't miss waking up early.  Staying late is but a small price to pay.  XD  Although, starting this week, we'll be staying later and later.. >.< 

Didn't learn much of anything today, other than how to umm.. serve wine i guess.  Sorta.  >.>  Now is a work period.. Maybe I should do some homework?  But I don't really feel like it. >_>  Boring.  Boring.... Super super boring boring.  X_x  zzZzz  I have a headache. 

Work this weekend was decent.  Chef gave me an extra shift because I told him I was broke.  XD Nice, eh?  =P

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Things to remember:
Meringue::
French = Whipped eggwhites, sugar added into the mixer about 1/2 way through.
Swiss = Eggwhites and sugar whipped over a double boiler until sugar dissolves
Italian = Sugar heated to "soft ball" stage (112 celcius) then added to egg whites

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Yay.

I hate the crap in school they make us do/look up.  I could really care less.  I dunno why I'm even here anymore.  I don't really care.  I love to cook, I dont' give a crap about all the technical junk or whatever.. Who cares, as long as I have basic knowledge and can do things... I guess I'm learning something, since I know alot more now than i did before... But I don't like being marked and graded on it, I guess.  Im not here to become the perfect master chef, Im here to learn more so I can do better, that's all.  Whatever.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cystic_fibrosis

That's what I'm researching now.  I did a project on it in grade 9... Which was well done, the info was all there, but the presentation was horrible.. Which is to be expected from me.  I get up in front of people and ramble, lose my train of thought.. I could know exactly what im talking about, it could be something that i love and know tons about, but i'd still fuck it up if i was talking in front of people.  Meh..

But yeah.. Learning is good, not that it's helping any, in this case.  It's good to know info.  My sister was recently put in hospital again because of yet another lung infection that she can't get rid of on her own with the normal set of drugs... Which is normal for CF patients.  The bacteria thrives in the thick mucous in their lungs, so it is common for them to have to take stronger batches, or have IV (in her case a PICC line -> http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Peripherally_inserted_central_catheter ) put in so that the drugs can be given to her in a more effective way.  >.> 

Apparently there's side effects of the drugs... Which, yea, there always is.  >.<  Hearing loss or kidney problems.. hooray.  I trust the doctors here pretty well though... The CF team in Winnipeg is one of the best in the world, they've done tons of research here, and even discovered things in the labs here... We're actually pretty lucky to live in Winnipeg, for that reason, and also for the reason that my sisters qualify for the "Drugs for Life" program in Manitoba.  What that is, is basically how it sounds.  My sisters need these medications to live, so the government pays for everything we get in full.  Before my parents separated, our whole family was on this plan... When my mom divorced, she got taken off, but I believe my dad is still on it.  When me and my brother turned 18, we got taken off it as well... But my sisters will be on it for their entire lives, assuming they don't move out of Manitoba.  So essentially, one part of their lives has been decided for them already (one of quite a few anyway) in that, they have no choice but to remain in Manitoba, else face the horribly high prices of the meds they have to take...  Which would be upwards of $1000 per person each month...  I'm pretty sure if not for the Drugs for Life program, my family would be... Well.. Very very very broke, to say the least.  =_=

So this disease affects the Lungs, Pancreas, and Liver primarily.  The lungs are a given.. Obviously both my sisters have issues with their lungs, Chrissy being the worse of the two.. In pretty much every way, except her Pancreas seems to have a bit more function to it than Lisa's does... Though, this could also be due to the fact that Lisa eats a LOT more than Chrissy does... >.>  The fact that she doesn't eat also leads me to believe that this is the reason she's sicker.. (Duh)  =_= 

Im beginning to wonder if i should stay in school or not... I dunno really.  Ive been thinking maybe I should just get a full time job and make some money to help out my family more... Honestly, I want to finish, but i dont really feel like its for the RIGHT reasons..  Why would i finish?  Because I dont want to disappoint my family.. I dont want to waste the time and money I've put into it so far.  But honestly, I dont think it'd be a complete waste.  I've learned alot here so far, and it's gotten my "foot in the door" so to speak, on quite a few jobs that i'd never have been able to get before this.  If i finish, though, I'll also get my diploma, which would look alot nicer than "a year and a half of college" >.>  I don't have that much longer to go... Just, just until next May.. That's not so far off.  But im finding it hard to keep my focus on this stuff, i know my marks are suffering because of it.  So i feel like its a waste of time.  Eh..  I've been told to tough it out and i'll feel better about it when i do get to the end.  Im not a quitter either so i'd feel kinda dumb for dropping it this far in...  I guess we'll see...  It's not so bad.  I guess.  =_=

I'm just being depressive again.  >.<  Im so worried about my sister too, its not helping at all.  She's been sick alot, her health isn't getting any better, my mom and even the doctors are concerned.  She's gotten scarring on her lungs (Fibrosis -> http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fibrosis )  which, it's scarring, so is obviously irreversible.  And if it keeps getting worse, eventually her lungs wont be able to put oxygen into her bloodstream... That's what happens when you get lung infections, things like smoking even causes scarring in the lungs... Quite a lot less bad, and also I'll point out that smoking is a choice that people make... Fucking stupid if you ask me.  I'm not even gonna ever be sympathetic to people who smoke and get lung infections or sick because of it.  You're the moron who decided to smoke shit into your lungs.. people (like my sisters) would give anything to have normal working lungs, and there you are fucking yours up.  >_>  If you aren't gonna take care of em properly, how about i take em an give em to someone who will appreciate it?  Hmm?  BAH!

=_=  Now im just being bitter.  =  I dont wanna offend anyone. >.>  But even so. 

On the plus side, Both of them seem to have fine working livers.  AT least at the moment.  Chrissy has had probs with hers in the past, but it seems to have gotten by that point.  And even then, if there was anything really wrong, it is possible to replace a liver with only a portion of another, because the liver is self-regenerating.  SO, if it came right down to it, someone who has a match to my sister can donate a PART of their liver, so there's no need to have to worry about waiting for a donator.  The only problem would be finding the perfect match... It can be taken from me or my brother.. My mom and dad are too old plus my mom has had meningitis so they cant really take anything from her. Lisa also cant' because she's sick.. So i'd hope that me or my brother would be a match... Though, i've heard it's a tough process, especially for the donator, because their body has to  cope with losing a part of something that was there before...  Which is fine.  X3  If i can help, i'd totally do it.

I should probably be trying harder to keep a better outlook, if only for the sake of um... Good morale of the rest of my family..  Hah.. not that I've ever been any form of support or anything for my family.  My mom always tells me im so cold hearted, harsh, uncaring... Ah yes.. Someone like that can't provide moral support for anyone.  Right?

Bah.. >_>  In class, trying not to cry.. This blows.  =_=